Indescribable Cabbages

Bless his little pea pickin’ heart…My husband, DD, is a computer programmer. More specifically, he writes web applications. You know what that is right? Well, if you don’t you can skip this entire entry. If you do, bless your pea pickin’ heart, too.

So, I have been bugging him about “writing code” for some time. Like as in, “If I could write code, I could make the big bucks, too!” He’s always told me, “Sure, I can show you. But, I’m not sure you’ll really like it.”

I was hanging out around the house the other day, as usual. I was having my afternoon snack. Which that afternoon was a huge slice of fresh red cabbage. Sans garnish or condiment, of course. I was cruching away and dear DD corralled me into “helping” him. I went to his office, pulled up a chair and asked how I could help. DD needed to figure out the a way of setting up the logistics for a menu system for a new website. Could I help him? Sure, I guessed I could.

So far, so good. Except I kept Crunching on my cabbage. As he described his “programming pickle” he glanced over at me and said, “That is Indescribably Irritating” I said, “What? My bad cabbage breath, now way.”

‘Nope, it’s your irritating crunching.’
Then I breathed on him and said, “What? This isn’t irritating?”
“No, that’s just totally rank.”

On to more programming, more crunching, but no more strategically directed exhales. We worked on the problem of the sequencing of the menu. DD actually began to write the code, test it, then revise, rewrite and revamp the code. I said that I likened it to doing a Rubik’s Cube. (Which, by the way, I could never complete) It’s a giant puzzle where one move inevitably influenced the next move and so on, and so on, and so on. (and they told two friends, and they told two friends) Well, he said he had to agree with my theory.

I watched him code, test, revise and revamp for another 10 or 15 minutes…then I asked if my presence had somehow helped him. He said it certainly did. And then I bailed. It was all I could handle. Yikes.

I never want to learn to write code beyond very, very basic html. My hat’s off to him and all the other web app developers. You do what you do, I’ll do what I do and it will be a fine world. Oh, when I’m ordering more crap from Amazon.com, make sure that freakin’ website and database keeps on working.

Website results:
DD and HP “working” on coding = 25 minutes Problems solved by coding = 0
DD really working on coding = 5 hours Problems solved by coding = all of them

He’s a genius.

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About hellpellet

a little pellet of hell
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